blogphilic celebrates its sixth anniversary today – I can’t be any prouder!
This same day six years ago, as an overly-dramatic sixteen year-old, I’d created this blog. I moved it from its pilot home at now-defunct blogdrive to WordPress, where I’ve really found a place and lots of comfort in. Still loving it here.
When I started out six years ago, I was an over-the-top and arrogant teenager. I thought I had the world on my shoulders to carry and wanted to be heard. I wrote in journals for years but the silence always bothered me – I believed so strongly I had a voice which needed to be heard. I thought I was great.
Then seventeen happened and my world crashed, my ego deflated a thousand times. A friendship tragedy took place, the family drama never ceased and I graduated from high school, leaving the bubble of a protected environment for good. It was time to grow up and face the world – I was unprepared.
I turned eighteen quietly and unhappily – my worse year, the one I’ve purposefully blocked mentally, though never quite emotionally. Identity crises one after another came crashing, uninvited. Things I believed I deserved, having worked so hard in high school… In reality, they mattered little. The scholarship rat race was ugly – rejection after rejection and the college life was even worse. I was neither here, nor there. Neither that, nor this. Just when I thought things would never end, they did. I left the college and have never looked back since.
In spring 2010, I turned nineteen in the company of newly found friends and in a still-foreign land – a first. Everything then was a first, to put it simply. It was spring break and we were on a road trip across North and South Carolina. I didn’t know them well then, but I appreciated the surprise celebration they had planned just for me. It was my first time being away from the family home, although I’d thankfully survived the first three months in one piece. Slowly but surely, I was growing into my own – shedding old skin and building new ones. In all that were lost, I gained so much more.
When I turned twenty, I thought nothing could top that. I was in San Diego, CA with the parents who’d flown halfway across the globe to be with me. We spent time there and then moved on to San Francisco, which was the year I visited Berkeley and felt my heart stricken with pain. I knew then that my educational journey couldn’t just end with the bachelor’s degree – I needed a second chance. There’s a great photo Dad took of me on my birthday eve – I stood in the middle of a path with my hands extended wide open and my face facing the sunny skies. I squinted my eyes to avoid the sun’s glare, the corners of my mouth lifted; I was in the moment.
It turns out that records are meant to be broken and memories are to be piled upon – I turned twenty-one even more memorably, if that’s possible, in a beautiful, quaint city known to be a writer’s haven: Edinburgh, Scotland. I had a most relaxing spring break with my elderly, Scottish host family – it was a magical week and I learned to close a chapter of my teenage years, one I’d always believed I could never make peace with. I returned to Philly with so much excitement and happiness, greeted by my two girls in the apartment I still hold near and dear in my heart.
Twenty-two proved to be much quieter, more contemplative. Another spring break and we were in New York City, just about my favorite city in the world, crossing a to-do in my bucket list – watch a Broadway show. There were no cakes or anything of that sort, but they came together to buy a small gift and as I looked at the faces of my three traveling companions, I thought to myself, “Here are friends for keeps.”
Now I’m here and I’ve left all of that and every single person mentioned, behind. I’ve tread halfway across the globe once more to live a dream I believed so strongly to be a long time coming. I’ve only been here a little over a month and its been rough; as many bad days to each good one. I am learning, losing and finding myself at each fork of the road. I’m on the verge of adulthood, truly and sincerely, and it’s an affecting journey.
Through everything above, one thing has stayed constant: blogphilic.
Cheers to the past six years of writing and living, and many more of personal growth!