Reunion-of-sort lunches with old friends here first connected during internship in ’12 always bring a wave of nostalgia and small happiness in an unmarked corner of my heart. I had one today, overlooking the greenery of the golf course, with my old colleague from Environmental team. I’ll be honest: I have something of a love/hate relationship with him – much too sassy, this one – but he is someone with whom, back then and now, I’m able to speak candidly with. It was such a good meet; refreshing and necessary like my two-hour long lunch with Platonic Crush (my buddy from internship days) two weeks ago.
(Also: “I’ll creep you out with how much I remember from four years ago,” I said with a laugh. Truest words.)
I find it nice, a relief almost, that to friends like them who (really) know me, this headscarf move, though maybe not unforeseen, is something of an in-joke between us. It’s here …and it changes nothing. It’s not so much a “You, really?” rather, it’s more like, “So what actually – actually – prompted this move?” (cue snickering) or “Ha, this is so you; still with the messy ‘do” – because my hair refuses to stay veiled… – and even ha, “So how long is this for -for real-?”
To be honest, several times during my decision-making period, I worried over losing friends due to this transition (Eldest Sis: “If this happens, they’re not friends worth having to begin with!”) so today, sincerely, I’m grateful for two things:
- The more I get to know new people, the more I realize I (already) have really nice, kind souls as (real) friends
- My personal belief in keeping it real …as in, be my authentic self no matter with who, when, what, and how I look etc is something that I now believe is truly true-to-(my)character – I am, in every sense of the word, real
While the headscarf is now part of me, I love it so, so much that what old/close friends see – now and back then, already, it seems – is just me; ever-awkward, sometimes lame and super chatty. It feels nice – absolutely wonderful – to be accepted as a whole person. I’m grateful for these wonderful, kind souls – what blessings they are to my heart, truly and sincerely.