I think there are some things in my life that I just didn’t know, never realized, their worth in my life – until I let them go.
You always want what you no longer have; it’s frustratingly true.
These days I run around, mentally and emotionally, in circles trying to retrieve lost sentiments, interests… people. Lost hearts; as if trying to ask for refund for feelings not reciprocated and time spent writing open letters and reflective write-ups.
“How many times do I have to rebuild and start anew?”
I let the darkness of the night consume me, inside and out.
“I’m 25. I’m young yes, but I don’t feel so young anymore to keep starting anew; having to wade through all the newness for a sense of belonging and familiarity. I don’t know how long I want to keep doing this – my resistance just keeps building up.”
Some days – like today – adulthood is an unceasing minefield.