These days I keep wishing, if only I can have the best of my many worlds in one place –
Whether this means having my best and closest friends from my hometown passing time (of which there’s plenty) with me in Miri; to my Miri-based closest friends enjoying our hangout sessions in my typical go-to hometown neighborhood joints – places that I often bring up in our conversations -; to even the friendships made in Philly and Stanford. With Malaysian friends befriended abroad, our dynamics don’t quite jive in the same manner ever since we came back home to Malaysia (or are out of those cities) and with international friends, we’re naturally physically distanced.
Sometimes it really feels like I’ll always have to learn to love (new) people and just as they become (old) familiar –
I’ve to learn to let them go and start all over again.
Can’t I… just love the ones I love without having to fly everywhere just to spend time and be in their company? Or do I ‘get’ special snowflakes at particular eras of my life exactly because to recognize the worth of a person is to acknowledge they’re merely temporarily borrowed?
I am exhausted. Some days I want to shout silly, “Why is nobody permanent?!”
Can’t I – why can’t I – love the ones I love in the same spatial and temporal context?
“In the right light, at the right time, everything is extraordinary.”
— Aaron Rose