Hello… it’s hard to believe that I’m here, back here, writing. I think it’s been a year-plus since I last wrote? Life happened. Correction: it’s still happening and really, it’s the reason I’m back. I just wanted to write down some thoughts and lots of feelings off my chest. Where do I begin? Let’s jump … More 28.
Putting this here because I want to remember these words and this feeling: After 5 straight days of working till nighttime at platform then barge, today my body experienced an internal system shutdown so I called it a day early (at 530 PM haha) and enjoyed, finally, my favorite solitary activity offshore: an evening up … More August rush.
A long list of what it is like in the inner recesses – still a maze and clouded by shame – of my mind and heart: “He’s just not that into you” “It feels like a rejection as an individual and it… hurts. I get it if you don’t like like me – but why … More Office Crush / Stranger Crush
Back here cos this is my safe space for whenever I attempt to mentally declutter: I am actually and have been in a real soul and heart unease lately. It has been a few months but I feel like my bouts of loneliness are getting (or just feeling) worse. The thing is, lest you worry, … More heart-pain / heart-work
Trevor Noah reiterated several times in his fantastic memoir ‘Born A Crime’ that race is a social construct. I nodded my head each time that sentence appeared, yet no closer to unwinding my own views. More than the stories of his mother (who is amazing, naturally reminded me of mine) and his frank views on … More half-half / neither
Through with December; here’s the last one from December 3, 2017! Eldest Sis, on friendship: “Find yourself friends who will be anchors. I don’t mean that you always have to stick by each other; what I mean is friends who will ground you – through the years, and times.” — [Photo of my Miri faves] … More “Find yourself friends who will be anchors.”
Another woeful piece written in December – on the 10th, to be precise -: Eldest Sis believes strongly in this particular quote: “I think a man does what he can, until his destiny is revealed.” — from The Last Samurai (2003) The quote came to my mind again last night when I joined Mum for … More “I think a man does what he can, until his destiny is revealed.”
A piece I wrote on December 11, 2017 – an ode to (forever my) Housemate #1: “I won’t call it regret… maybe wonderment. A series of what ifs – what if I tried harder? What if I stayed back for a few more years? I’m not envious of others’ good news, that I’m clear – … More “So when you hear of others’ good news, you shouldn’t feel shorthanded-“
Written on January 17, 2018 – reposting because how quickly I’d forgotten… -: A newish friend with whom I enjoy exchanging stories of work-life with (cos of the parallelism in our respective journeys, a year apart, and how hard we are on ourselves) mulled this today, “When I think of myself today at 27 – … More ‘growth is a lifelong craft’
Many years ago, at a time when I barely understood the word ‘integrity‘, Third Sis spoke of it with conviction. I was then telling her about the kind of shady things that happen in businesses and corporations; dealings that are unethical and corrupt etc. In my idealism and strong on principles, I was naturally both … More (I’m)possible.